A Week, Briefly (4/29/19)
Tuesday afternoon, during lunch, I shared with my crew that I was working very hard to remember and act on Proverbs 3:5-6.
It was a traumatic weekend, and I was trying to overcome the need to break down into tears and shaking every hour or so.
I opened the little devotional book we were finishing up this week and turned to page of the day. Lo, and behold, the subject was trusting in the Lord even when we're frightened--especially when we're frightened--and in the illustration for the story was the very scripture I'd just told the kids I'd chosen for my mantra for the week!
If that isn't a personal message from the Lord, I don't know what is.
You see, Beowulf was on our front porch early Saturday evening for screaming in the house. He screamed louder when I put him on the porch, and he'd proceeded to keep screaming for upwards of 20 minutes when there was a knock on our front door.
It was the police letting me know they'd been called by someone who felt my child was in danger.
Long story short, they spent 20 minutes interviewing me and Beowulf, walked through our home, and took down names, birthdates, and phone numbers before leaving.
And on Monday morning a social worker appeared and did the same thing.
She said she was going back to the office to close the case, so that's a good thing, but even typing the words now, at the end of the week, makes me shake.
It was terrifying.
And I don't know what to do with my out of control children now because the porch was our safe place where they could scream and rail and spit and throw things as long as they needed to without hurting anyone or anything in our home. We have no neighbors across the street, and the porch is covered for protection from the elements. Our neighbors to either side are some 100+ yards away, and we have tree breaks between the properties. That porch was working as a safe place for our kids to calm down.
The social worker said that a safe place is a good idea.
But if someone is going to report us to the authorities for using our porch as a safe place, we can't use it anymore.
*cue Proverbs 3:5-6*
*cue breathing*
In addition to being interviewed by an unannounced social worker on Monday morning, I took Beowulf to see his primary care doc who agreed with the clinical psychologist that he needed a referral to the ADHD clinic for care. While we wait the 4-8 weeks for that appointment to materialize, the doc went ahead and prescribed a non-stimulant ADHD med (she listened to my reports about Brother and Ladybug) for Beowulf. As the non-stimulant drugs are slow acting, we've yet to see a positive change, but the good part is there's no negative change.
When that appointment was finished, I traded Beowulf for Pixie and took her to the chiropractor.
Looks like she's just about mended!
Once the social worker left, we had lunch and squeezed in as much school (We started Myself and Others from Memoria Press. It is so, so, so right for my family. I nearly cried several times during the week to have such a good resource in my hands.) and outdoor play as possible because rain was in the forecast for the next 5 days straight.
The promised rain came on Tuesday, along with thunder and lightning all day, keeping us housebound every single minute. The young ones played with building toys while I read Dracula for Symposium, then the older ones worked on essays and other independent school while I ran through Academy and individual school.
I was done with the day by 3:00 pm.
So were the rest of the kids.
But we had to go on.
I put out playdough and our huge bag of playdough toys for the young ones, and Nature Angel and I sat down to knitting projects.
Finally it was close enough to the end of the day to serve dinner and call it quits.
We finished Mustaches for Maddie.
Really, it is a must-read.
I'm pretty sure Belle stayed up late working on her Unit 10 essay, but most of the rest of us were in bed early!
On Wednesday, the rain gave us a little break, and Sir Walter Scott--ever my hero--took a stack of towels and the 8 youngest to the park while I read and read and read from Dracula (this book is very long).
The teens all finished their Unit 10 art projects.
Such an odd assignment! But that was the end of their art curriculum, and I've counted enough hours for .5 credit, so it was worth it.
When the kids came home, I took Brother off to his next visit with his psychiatrist at which she expressed similar gratitude to mine that he is tolerating the third med quite well. She increased his current med by a teensy bit to see if we can get a bit more improvement for him. (I also got him an appointment with the autism specialist in the clinic and got Ladybug an appointment with the clinical psychologist for testing--both appointments are in August!) Simultaneously Pixie took off to her second-to-last history class and Sir Walter Scott got Belle to the farm.
During Academy we finished The Children's Book of Heroes.
I quit giving Ladybug her med because it was making her angry. She was starting fights and crying all day long, and I had to wait until it wore off to do any school. When the ADHD med interferes with school, it's surely the wrong med! She sees her psychiatrist next week, and we'll try another one.
I hate that the kids are on and off such powerful drugs, but I keep being reminded that when we find the right med, it will be a blessing for us all.
Youth activities at church were for everyone age 8 and up, so it was another early night for the 5 young ones and me.
Rain, thunder, and lighting greeted us Thursday morning, and every single person in the house was on edge. Lola had a monster tantrum before breakfast and two more by 10 am. And I'm talking curtain-ripping-down-bed-tearing-apart-kicking-screaming-violent tantrums. It was terrifyingly reminiscent of what Ladybug was like when she first arrived in our home at approximately the same age, along with memories of holding Rose Red through nightmare tantrums also at the age of 4. I'm not the only one in the house with wide eyes and big questions about what is to come for Lola.
I assigned every kid to a separate space (or carefully assigned 2 kids to a space if I knew they could handle it) for the whole morning.
We had Symposium, which consisted of me reading Dracula and then reading drafts of Unit 10 essays that are due tomorrow. The girls have written thoughtful, insightful essays, and I'm proud of what they're learning.
At lunch, it became time for the young ones to have some attention, and we finished Teach them to Your Children. We had a very sweet review of our favorite stories before moving on to start The Children's Book of Faith.
And unexpectedly, the sun came out!
I sent the young ones outside while I helped Pixie with a history assignment, and they got to alternate outside play with indoor school time for the whole afternoon.
I'm counting that sun as a tender mercy direct from Heavenly Father!
Mister Man finished Rod and Staff grade 1 math completely.
And he helped Lola with her preschool while I helped Baymax with his.
Nature Angel organized some of the kids into a production of Rapunzel that we all gathered to watch before dinner.
Later that evening, Lola fell asleep still shaking in spite of more than an hour's cuddling after the tantrum she threw over dinner.
Friday morning dawned cloudy, but the forecasted rain didn't materialize until late in the day which means the young ones got time to ride bikes, dig in the sand, and play games outside. Then Sir Walter Scott bundled them into the van for a ride to REI to pick up a bike tool he needed. It was a pretty good trek, and they were not only stopped at a train crossing, but they got to see a train depot, and they came home noisy, happy, and pouring out stories of trains to me--none of them coherent, all of them joyful.
The teens and I read Dracula and discussed our already purchased tickets to see Mamma Mia in the evening. Various bits and pieces of information revealed about the production company and theater location--none of them good--led us to increasing discomfort about attending. Long story short, we're not going.
I looked up the ticket policy.
"No refunds. All sales final."
Rats.
Looks like we're eating that cost.
At least some of the proceeds will go to the local children's hospital.
The teens are off to a birthday party they were going to have to miss, so perhaps Sir Walter Scott and I can tuck young ones in bed early and have a movie night together at home . . . but perhaps we'll just fall asleep.
I'm not sure which has more appeal.
We had a full day of school, during which the teens turned in their final essays.
Super Star finished Apologia's Exploring Creation with Physical Science!
And I found out there is paprika (member of the nightshade family) in the mayonnaise I buy--no wonder the sores around Baymax's mouth still haven't disappeared! I don't want to go back to making my own mayo, so he'll just live without. :)
Lola only threw one tantrum, and it was the ordinary-garden-variety-tired-4-year-old kind. Other than waking up very thirsty and lethargic (who wouldn't be after the day she'd had on Thursday?), she had a happy day.
And after finishing a final project
and writing a final evaluation, Nature Angel finished her science book, too!
The teens have a formal dance to attend tomorrow evening, so there's sewing and hair-curling and nail-doing going on at odd moments in between studying.
It's May, and we're nearly done with the courses of study we began last fall, but we're so locked under clouds that summer still feels far away . . .
It was a traumatic weekend, and I was trying to overcome the need to break down into tears and shaking every hour or so.
I opened the little devotional book we were finishing up this week and turned to page of the day. Lo, and behold, the subject was trusting in the Lord even when we're frightened--especially when we're frightened--and in the illustration for the story was the very scripture I'd just told the kids I'd chosen for my mantra for the week!
If that isn't a personal message from the Lord, I don't know what is.
You see, Beowulf was on our front porch early Saturday evening for screaming in the house. He screamed louder when I put him on the porch, and he'd proceeded to keep screaming for upwards of 20 minutes when there was a knock on our front door.
It was the police letting me know they'd been called by someone who felt my child was in danger.
Long story short, they spent 20 minutes interviewing me and Beowulf, walked through our home, and took down names, birthdates, and phone numbers before leaving.
And on Monday morning a social worker appeared and did the same thing.
She said she was going back to the office to close the case, so that's a good thing, but even typing the words now, at the end of the week, makes me shake.
It was terrifying.
And I don't know what to do with my out of control children now because the porch was our safe place where they could scream and rail and spit and throw things as long as they needed to without hurting anyone or anything in our home. We have no neighbors across the street, and the porch is covered for protection from the elements. Our neighbors to either side are some 100+ yards away, and we have tree breaks between the properties. That porch was working as a safe place for our kids to calm down.
The social worker said that a safe place is a good idea.
But if someone is going to report us to the authorities for using our porch as a safe place, we can't use it anymore.
*cue Proverbs 3:5-6*
*cue breathing*
In addition to being interviewed by an unannounced social worker on Monday morning, I took Beowulf to see his primary care doc who agreed with the clinical psychologist that he needed a referral to the ADHD clinic for care. While we wait the 4-8 weeks for that appointment to materialize, the doc went ahead and prescribed a non-stimulant ADHD med (she listened to my reports about Brother and Ladybug) for Beowulf. As the non-stimulant drugs are slow acting, we've yet to see a positive change, but the good part is there's no negative change.
When that appointment was finished, I traded Beowulf for Pixie and took her to the chiropractor.
Looks like she's just about mended!
Once the social worker left, we had lunch and squeezed in as much school (We started Myself and Others from Memoria Press. It is so, so, so right for my family. I nearly cried several times during the week to have such a good resource in my hands.) and outdoor play as possible because rain was in the forecast for the next 5 days straight.
The promised rain came on Tuesday, along with thunder and lightning all day, keeping us housebound every single minute. The young ones played with building toys while I read Dracula for Symposium, then the older ones worked on essays and other independent school while I ran through Academy and individual school.
I was done with the day by 3:00 pm.
So were the rest of the kids.
But we had to go on.
I put out playdough and our huge bag of playdough toys for the young ones, and Nature Angel and I sat down to knitting projects.
Finally it was close enough to the end of the day to serve dinner and call it quits.
We finished Mustaches for Maddie.
Really, it is a must-read.
I'm pretty sure Belle stayed up late working on her Unit 10 essay, but most of the rest of us were in bed early!
On Wednesday, the rain gave us a little break, and Sir Walter Scott--ever my hero--took a stack of towels and the 8 youngest to the park while I read and read and read from Dracula (this book is very long).
The teens all finished their Unit 10 art projects.
 |
| Pixie's |
 |
| Belle's |
 |
| Super Star's |
Such an odd assignment! But that was the end of their art curriculum, and I've counted enough hours for .5 credit, so it was worth it.
When the kids came home, I took Brother off to his next visit with his psychiatrist at which she expressed similar gratitude to mine that he is tolerating the third med quite well. She increased his current med by a teensy bit to see if we can get a bit more improvement for him. (I also got him an appointment with the autism specialist in the clinic and got Ladybug an appointment with the clinical psychologist for testing--both appointments are in August!) Simultaneously Pixie took off to her second-to-last history class and Sir Walter Scott got Belle to the farm.
During Academy we finished The Children's Book of Heroes.
I quit giving Ladybug her med because it was making her angry. She was starting fights and crying all day long, and I had to wait until it wore off to do any school. When the ADHD med interferes with school, it's surely the wrong med! She sees her psychiatrist next week, and we'll try another one.
I hate that the kids are on and off such powerful drugs, but I keep being reminded that when we find the right med, it will be a blessing for us all.
 |
| Little Princess (above) and Nature Angel (below) picked up the pottery they painted last week! |
Youth activities at church were for everyone age 8 and up, so it was another early night for the 5 young ones and me.
Rain, thunder, and lighting greeted us Thursday morning, and every single person in the house was on edge. Lola had a monster tantrum before breakfast and two more by 10 am. And I'm talking curtain-ripping-down-bed-tearing-apart-kicking-screaming-violent tantrums. It was terrifyingly reminiscent of what Ladybug was like when she first arrived in our home at approximately the same age, along with memories of holding Rose Red through nightmare tantrums also at the age of 4. I'm not the only one in the house with wide eyes and big questions about what is to come for Lola.
I assigned every kid to a separate space (or carefully assigned 2 kids to a space if I knew they could handle it) for the whole morning.
We had Symposium, which consisted of me reading Dracula and then reading drafts of Unit 10 essays that are due tomorrow. The girls have written thoughtful, insightful essays, and I'm proud of what they're learning.
At lunch, it became time for the young ones to have some attention, and we finished Teach them to Your Children. We had a very sweet review of our favorite stories before moving on to start The Children's Book of Faith.
And unexpectedly, the sun came out!
I sent the young ones outside while I helped Pixie with a history assignment, and they got to alternate outside play with indoor school time for the whole afternoon.
I'm counting that sun as a tender mercy direct from Heavenly Father!
Mister Man finished Rod and Staff grade 1 math completely.
And he helped Lola with her preschool while I helped Baymax with his.
Nature Angel organized some of the kids into a production of Rapunzel that we all gathered to watch before dinner.
 |
| Worried about his wife, the Good Man sneaked into the witch's garden to gather some rapunzel. |
 |
| But the witch appeared! She let the Good Man go when he promised (in a panic) to give her the child his wife was carrying. |
 |
| Some months later, and to the deep sorrow of the Good Man and his Wife, the Witch came to claim the child. |
 |
| The Witch named the child Rapunzel and put her in a high tower where she lived alone save for the occasional company of the Witch herself. |
 |
| One day a Prince heard Rapunzel singing, and he made his way to the high tower. They fell in love, and they planned Rapunzel's escape. |
 |
| The prince came with as much string as he could find for Rapunzel to twist into a rope. Each time he visited, he called, "Rapunzel! Rapunzel! Let down your golden hair!" and when she did so, he climbed her hair to the tower room. |
 |
| One day the Witch came to visit, and as she climbed Rapunzel's hair, Rapunzel mistakenly said, "Oh! You are so heavy! The Prince never pulls as you do!" The Witch put 2 & 2 together, and cut off Rapunzel's beautiful hair before casting Rapunzel out into a far desert to wander alone. |
 |
| Unknowingly, the Prince arrived to visit with Rapunzel, but as he reached the top of the tower, the Witch cast him down to the ground where he fell into the thorn bushes and was blinded. |
 |
| Rapunzel cried in her lonely desert life. |
 |
| The Prince wandered blindly through the wide world, searching for his beloved Rapunzel. One day, he happened upon a camel train where the camel drivers told him they knew a girl who fit Rapunzel's description. The kindly camel driver led the blind Prince to Rapunzel's lonely camp. |
 |
| Found! They threw themselves into each other's arms, and as Rapunzel cried, the tears fell on the eyes of her blinded Prince, and his sight was restored. They left the desert together, never to be parted again. |
Later that evening, Lola fell asleep still shaking in spite of more than an hour's cuddling after the tantrum she threw over dinner.
Friday morning dawned cloudy, but the forecasted rain didn't materialize until late in the day which means the young ones got time to ride bikes, dig in the sand, and play games outside. Then Sir Walter Scott bundled them into the van for a ride to REI to pick up a bike tool he needed. It was a pretty good trek, and they were not only stopped at a train crossing, but they got to see a train depot, and they came home noisy, happy, and pouring out stories of trains to me--none of them coherent, all of them joyful.
The teens and I read Dracula and discussed our already purchased tickets to see Mamma Mia in the evening. Various bits and pieces of information revealed about the production company and theater location--none of them good--led us to increasing discomfort about attending. Long story short, we're not going.
I looked up the ticket policy.
"No refunds. All sales final."
Rats.
Looks like we're eating that cost.
At least some of the proceeds will go to the local children's hospital.
The teens are off to a birthday party they were going to have to miss, so perhaps Sir Walter Scott and I can tuck young ones in bed early and have a movie night together at home . . . but perhaps we'll just fall asleep.
I'm not sure which has more appeal.
We had a full day of school, during which the teens turned in their final essays.
Super Star finished Apologia's Exploring Creation with Physical Science!
And I found out there is paprika (member of the nightshade family) in the mayonnaise I buy--no wonder the sores around Baymax's mouth still haven't disappeared! I don't want to go back to making my own mayo, so he'll just live without. :)
Lola only threw one tantrum, and it was the ordinary-garden-variety-tired-4-year-old kind. Other than waking up very thirsty and lethargic (who wouldn't be after the day she'd had on Thursday?), she had a happy day.
And after finishing a final project
 |
| Waxed paper worked so much better than a cork for making a needle compass. |
The teens have a formal dance to attend tomorrow evening, so there's sewing and hair-curling and nail-doing going on at odd moments in between studying.
It's May, and we're nearly done with the courses of study we began last fall, but we're so locked under clouds that summer still feels far away . . .
Oh, I am so sorry about the police and social worker visit. I remember well the time the police knocked on our door late at night because of a crying child. They said a neighbor had called and said screaming had come from our home all day. It was true...Katie had thrown tantrums all day long in raging RAD fashion and then the baby was crying herself to sleep in her crib when the police showed up. They toured the house and realized that Katie was the child they had taken out of her birth home at gun point. They thanked us for adopting her, wished us luck and made their goodbyes. They told the neighbor to bring down some tea and chocolate for the mom the next time they heard screaming coming from our home. I was shaken for days none the less.
ReplyDeleteI hope the sun comes out on all sides for your family soon.
Blessings, Dawn
What a frightening time for you. I hope you find a safe space. What a week. I feel stressed out and anxious just reading the stresses. Praying for good medicine fit for each child, appointments as you need them, and an overflow of peace in the little moments. ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteI’m sorry they got involved like that. You might know I was a caseworker briefly. The wrong battles are picked all the time. You do great with those kids. Not everyone can hold it down like you do. Those caseworkers that come knocking are a huge fear now.
ReplyDeleteOh goodness. This makes me feel sick just thinking about it. Why can’t people discern between alarming and non-alarming anymore?! I don’t blame you for being shaken. I’m so sorry. I am sure the social workers, if they had any sense at all, could feel the love and care you have for your children. The front porch seems like the perfect safe space! I hope you can find another solution that works.
ReplyDeleteOn a happier note--your kids art projects are always amazing! They are so observant and talented!
Parenting is hard enough we don't need to worry about what other people think of our parenting. Some people just don't understand what it is like to deal with children that have difficulties when there is absolutely nothing you can do but wait it out. You are doing the very best you can in difficult situations. I hope you find a solution to your safe space and that all of the medications and appointments get worked out. The children's pottery and artwork are just beautiful and the play looks fantastic! So much creativity and talent in your house!
ReplyDelete