Adoption: Sometimes Love Takes (A Long) Time

Again, the approach of our one-year anniversary of receiving our new children into our home had led me to lots of introspection.  The week before we picked the children up I told the children we already had, "Just give it a year.  Things will be really different in a year.  At first it will be hard and strange, but after a year it will be okay."

I was wrong.

It is really different now than it was at first.

In many, many ways it is better.

But after a year it is not okay; it is still hard and strange.

The kids are starting to call me out for my mistake.

I haven't known what to answer except to ask, "Would you give them back?"

And my angriest children say, "Yes!"

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.
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I would not give them back . . . most of the time.

I would not give them back.

They are ours forever.

It's just taking far more time to feel that forever connection than I thought.

So I'm giving us all another year.

And perhaps, after that, another . . .

Until forever.