We are trying to prepare our house for sale. All of the little fixes and repairs that would have been nice but were deemed unnecessary over the past several years while my husband was in school are absolutely necessary now. Things like replacing the broken basement window with something other than cardboard, fixing the leaky shower drain, replacing the screens with holes in them, painting the interior walls after 10 years of kids using them as art surfaces, installing the baseboards in the little girls' room, and so forth and so on ad nauseum.
At least the list makes me slightly nauseous.
In January I reduced our school plan to about 2 solid hours per day. I still did preschool with H3 and A5 and still did language arts activities with A5. I also worked on completing our Old Testament reading/study/journals with the older kids. On their own they had to do math, their choice of workbook subject matter (more math, reading comprehension, grammar, whatever), and work on their individual elective: Latin for E12, First Aid then Africa for M10 (now M11!), Goats then spelling bee preparation for S10, and Horses for J9.
The rest of the day was devoted to cleaning, painting, shopping, and otherwise prepping our home.
It still wasn't enough time.
We do have to eat.
And there are kids to take care of, after all.
We just had my dad out for a week. He's a former general contractor, and he spent 5 days helping us solve problems that were just too big for us to solve on our own. We did no school, but focused our energies on the urgent tasks at hand.
We were working hard, but then I got sick again. I never get sick like this!!! I've been out of comission for too long and the tasks are piling up. Progress I've made is getting undone by just living life. The kids can't walk around with their hands at their sides not touching anything!
So I gave a little speech yesterday:
"You're on your own for school until we get our house ready. It is your choice to do school or not do it. I'll be available for questions and help if you need it, but I will not remind you to do schoolwork and I will not require it of you. If you don't want to fall behind where you want to be or forget what you've been doing, it is up to you to pull out your books when you get bored enough and do the work on your own. You may reserve library books. You may do research online when I can take a moment to supervise your web-surfing, but I am not requiring it of you. I will require you to help by watching the little kids, doing chores beyond your own, helping with meals, and by doing house prep jobs that must be taken care of. I expect you to help. That is our priority right now."
I actually spoke a little longer than that and fielded questions the big girls had, but that's the crux of it.
A giant snowstorm was scheduled to arrive in the afternoon, so we ran to the library and the grocery store in the morning. I borrowed about 12 science videos in the hopes that if I put the kids in front of them when I'm frantic with projects, I'd feel less guilty than if I put them in front of Disney videos--though I think Bill Nye the Science Guy is produced by Disney, so . . .
There's no "school" at my house these days. I'll be watching the kids to see what they choose to do as the days and weeks unfold ahead. In all sincerity, I hope they learn a lot about life and work and good choices.
This in an interesting season.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Friday, February 8, 2013
More Horses!
My precious J9 has only one riding lesson left--the one she's paying for out of her Christmas/birthday money. The ones that we've paid for are over.
When I watch her with the horses, though, my spirit cries out that this must go on! I cannot take this nourishment away from my small but growing girl.
I cannot afford it.
It cannot end.
I took my worries to my Heavenly Father . . . tentatively . . . informally . . . just wishfully . . . "I wish (J9) could keep riding . . ."
(That's not how I was taught to pray.)
I decided that one lesson per month cost the same as a month's worth of music or dance lessons, and we'd be willing to pay for those, so if she wanted to, she could continue with one lesson per month. It would have to do. It would have to be enough.
J9's beloved riding teacher is the owner of the barn (What delicious understatement it is that she calls her breathtaking arena and stables and farm "the barn."). Her daughters are beautiful, successful young women now, and as she cleaned out a few of their childhood possessions she thought that perhaps our family would enjoy giving them new life. I was so very touched.
Our conversation gave me the courage to bring up my wish for riding lessons to continue, though on a much reduced scale. I opened the topic with, "I never would have dreamed that horseback riding could be important, but when I look at my girl it is . . ."
And this dear woman said to me, "I've been thinking about that. I think that (J9) knows how to work. She has chores and responsibilities at home. I have chores here at the barn that she could do in exchange for riding, if that would be all right with you."
I can't even type this without weeping . . .
She was thinking about that?
If it would be all right with me?
I looked at the shining face of my precious daughter and I swallowed the lump in my throat so that I could accept her offer without blubbering like a baby. We agreed to email back and forth about the details. She and J9 turned to head off to the tack room whereupon I stepped quickly outside and did blubber like a baby.
I just prayed and prayed my gratitude.
She gets to ride. She gets her first job at age 9. She gets to keep spending time with one of the loveliest women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. She gets to grow her talents--to be fed and nurtured and mentored beyond anything I can give her.
Heavenly Father answered this smaller than small prayer in a way that is sweeter than sweet.
When I watch her with the horses, though, my spirit cries out that this must go on! I cannot take this nourishment away from my small but growing girl.
I cannot afford it.
It cannot end.
I took my worries to my Heavenly Father . . . tentatively . . . informally . . . just wishfully . . . "I wish (J9) could keep riding . . ."
(That's not how I was taught to pray.)
I decided that one lesson per month cost the same as a month's worth of music or dance lessons, and we'd be willing to pay for those, so if she wanted to, she could continue with one lesson per month. It would have to do. It would have to be enough.
J9's beloved riding teacher is the owner of the barn (What delicious understatement it is that she calls her breathtaking arena and stables and farm "the barn."). Her daughters are beautiful, successful young women now, and as she cleaned out a few of their childhood possessions she thought that perhaps our family would enjoy giving them new life. I was so very touched.
Our conversation gave me the courage to bring up my wish for riding lessons to continue, though on a much reduced scale. I opened the topic with, "I never would have dreamed that horseback riding could be important, but when I look at my girl it is . . ."
And this dear woman said to me, "I've been thinking about that. I think that (J9) knows how to work. She has chores and responsibilities at home. I have chores here at the barn that she could do in exchange for riding, if that would be all right with you."
I can't even type this without weeping . . .
She was thinking about that?
If it would be all right with me?
I looked at the shining face of my precious daughter and I swallowed the lump in my throat so that I could accept her offer without blubbering like a baby. We agreed to email back and forth about the details. She and J9 turned to head off to the tack room whereupon I stepped quickly outside and did blubber like a baby.
I just prayed and prayed my gratitude.
She gets to ride. She gets her first job at age 9. She gets to keep spending time with one of the loveliest women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. She gets to grow her talents--to be fed and nurtured and mentored beyond anything I can give her.
Heavenly Father answered this smaller than small prayer in a way that is sweeter than sweet.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
A Horse Changes Everything
I have worked hard to convince myself that expensive lessons outside of our home are luxuries rather than necessities. First, they make our days too frantic, and second, they cost too much money. Though I would love to indulge every extra-curricular whim of my children's hearts, I cannot.
I tell myself it is good for us to not get everything we want . . .
I remind myself that we have luxuries about which some people only get to dream . . .
I am firmly convinced that we have our whole lives before us in which to live, and if we miss some opportunities as children, there are years of adulthood yet ahead . . .
But that was before J9 had her first horseback riding lesson.
Several years ago a member of our homeschool group organized several (deeply discounted) sessions of group trail riding for one age bracket and half hour sessions riding a horse on a lead around the corral for a younger age bracket. E12 was old enough to go out on the trail, while S10 and M10 happily sat on the backs of gentle horses who patiently walked in circles for a living. J9 was too small to do anything more than hold my hand and look at the "pretty ponies."
We looked forward to doing it again the next year when J9 would be old enough to participate, but it turned out to be a one-time deal.
I don't think we've ever ridden a horse since.
But J9 has been hungry for horses. She reads about them; she talks about them; she studies them for her elective; she write stories about them; she draws them. Her hunger has been focused and sustained for so long that I broke a rule (with her permission) and combined her Christmas and birthday gift into one by buying her a package deal of 4 horseback riding lessons. They are frightfully expensive, and more than once I've been afraid that I've used our money unwisely by spending it this way, but the promise was made, the lessons scheduled, and there was no going back.
This Thursday was her first lesson. Many small irritations frustrated me that day--Isaac wouldn't go down for a nap; we left late; my cell phone died; the kids came along to watch, but then had to sit in the car with me because liability insurance when horses are involved is complicated; S10 had a dreadful breakdown over the disappointment; E12 didn't do her schoolwork--then I really looked at J9's face.
Not one irritation mattered in the light of the anticipation shining from her eyes.
Nothing was too frustrating to overcome for that sweet smile that she kept trying to repress but wouldn't be repressed.
Her instructor couldn't be more perfect for my girl; she's a mature, gracious, soft-spoken woman. I felt a connection between them immediately. It was with perfect confidence that I entrusted J9 to her care while I tried to entertain the troops in the van.
It was a long hour.
At the end I walked back to the stable to pick J9 up. She and her instructor were putting gear away and talking about some general concepts to remember for next time. J9 was glowing--alive and glowing! She and her instructor had that "we're best friends from another life" feeling about them as they talked.
I asked, "How was it? Was it wonderful?"
J9 couldn't put it into words. She just nodded her head, mute with joy.
Her instructor said, "She did an amazing job. She walked and trotted. When she trotted she kept her seat, and I've never seen that before in a first time rider. She just seemed to know how to keep her balance by being strong but loose."
I nudged J9 with my elbow and said, "Hey! Wow! Maybe you have a gift!"
"A gift. Yes, a gift. I would say that she has a gift, " replied the instructor thoughtfully. She smiled at J9 and said, "You are a gift to me. Your smile is the best thing I've ever seen. I wish I could take your picture and look at it whenever I need something to make me feel better. You rode very well. Yes, you have a gift."
Then they talked about horse-y things that I couldn't understand for a few minutes while I marveled.
This instructor is a sincere person. She's not loud or jokey or given to exaggeration. Her comments look rather shallow typed out for reading, but to hear them was another matter entirely. I believe her when she said that spending an hour teaching my girl was a gift to her. The energy between those two was palpable. The light on my girl's face was different from anything I've ever seen there.
Before this experience I would never ever have considered horseback riding to be essential. Food is essential. Shelter, love, faith, forgiveness--all are on my essential list.
But horses?
They're just really interesting and fun . . . if you like them.
Seeing my J9 and her instructor together is teaching me otherwise. Horses mean something powerful to them both. They share a love that passes my understanding.
Love, though, is on my essential list.
If that love is not fed it will die, and a part of J9 will die with it. Of that I am absolutely certain.
Suddenly horses are very, very important to me.
I would even go so far as to call them . . . essential.
I tell myself it is good for us to not get everything we want . . .
I remind myself that we have luxuries about which some people only get to dream . . .
I am firmly convinced that we have our whole lives before us in which to live, and if we miss some opportunities as children, there are years of adulthood yet ahead . . .
But that was before J9 had her first horseback riding lesson.
Several years ago a member of our homeschool group organized several (deeply discounted) sessions of group trail riding for one age bracket and half hour sessions riding a horse on a lead around the corral for a younger age bracket. E12 was old enough to go out on the trail, while S10 and M10 happily sat on the backs of gentle horses who patiently walked in circles for a living. J9 was too small to do anything more than hold my hand and look at the "pretty ponies."
We looked forward to doing it again the next year when J9 would be old enough to participate, but it turned out to be a one-time deal.
I don't think we've ever ridden a horse since.
But J9 has been hungry for horses. She reads about them; she talks about them; she studies them for her elective; she write stories about them; she draws them. Her hunger has been focused and sustained for so long that I broke a rule (with her permission) and combined her Christmas and birthday gift into one by buying her a package deal of 4 horseback riding lessons. They are frightfully expensive, and more than once I've been afraid that I've used our money unwisely by spending it this way, but the promise was made, the lessons scheduled, and there was no going back.
This Thursday was her first lesson. Many small irritations frustrated me that day--Isaac wouldn't go down for a nap; we left late; my cell phone died; the kids came along to watch, but then had to sit in the car with me because liability insurance when horses are involved is complicated; S10 had a dreadful breakdown over the disappointment; E12 didn't do her schoolwork--then I really looked at J9's face.
Not one irritation mattered in the light of the anticipation shining from her eyes.
Nothing was too frustrating to overcome for that sweet smile that she kept trying to repress but wouldn't be repressed.
Her instructor couldn't be more perfect for my girl; she's a mature, gracious, soft-spoken woman. I felt a connection between them immediately. It was with perfect confidence that I entrusted J9 to her care while I tried to entertain the troops in the van.
It was a long hour.
At the end I walked back to the stable to pick J9 up. She and her instructor were putting gear away and talking about some general concepts to remember for next time. J9 was glowing--alive and glowing! She and her instructor had that "we're best friends from another life" feeling about them as they talked.
I asked, "How was it? Was it wonderful?"
J9 couldn't put it into words. She just nodded her head, mute with joy.
Her instructor said, "She did an amazing job. She walked and trotted. When she trotted she kept her seat, and I've never seen that before in a first time rider. She just seemed to know how to keep her balance by being strong but loose."
I nudged J9 with my elbow and said, "Hey! Wow! Maybe you have a gift!"
"A gift. Yes, a gift. I would say that she has a gift, " replied the instructor thoughtfully. She smiled at J9 and said, "You are a gift to me. Your smile is the best thing I've ever seen. I wish I could take your picture and look at it whenever I need something to make me feel better. You rode very well. Yes, you have a gift."
Then they talked about horse-y things that I couldn't understand for a few minutes while I marveled.
This instructor is a sincere person. She's not loud or jokey or given to exaggeration. Her comments look rather shallow typed out for reading, but to hear them was another matter entirely. I believe her when she said that spending an hour teaching my girl was a gift to her. The energy between those two was palpable. The light on my girl's face was different from anything I've ever seen there.
Before this experience I would never ever have considered horseback riding to be essential. Food is essential. Shelter, love, faith, forgiveness--all are on my essential list.
But horses?
They're just really interesting and fun . . . if you like them.
Seeing my J9 and her instructor together is teaching me otherwise. Horses mean something powerful to them both. They share a love that passes my understanding.
Love, though, is on my essential list.
If that love is not fed it will die, and a part of J9 will die with it. Of that I am absolutely certain.
Suddenly horses are very, very important to me.
I would even go so far as to call them . . . essential.
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Guitar Lessons
E12 had her first guitar lesson last night. She got the guitar for Christmas a year ago. We tried book and video tutorials--borrowed from the library--but they just didn't help. The guitar was relegated to the top shelf of the closet after only a couple of months.
Last month I was inspired. There's a youth in our ward who plays the guitar very well. He's preparing to serve a mission, so he's on the hunt for work of any kind. He's a ballet teacher, so he's used to teaching. I asked him if he'd be willing to teach E12.
We struck a deal (in which I am woefully underpaying him, but hope to remedy that soon).
He showed up promptly and prepared.
I was impressed.
In spite of the chaos of getting the rest of the family off to a college basketball game to which they were invited at the last minute, he was poised and pleasant.
I was impressed again.
He's customizing the lessons to fit her interests.
I am impressed even more.
The only problem I can find is that E12 is a 12-year-old girl and her teacher is an 18-year-old boy, and I think her little heart pitter-pats too fast to think clearly. When I peeked in at the lessons, she had her eyes downcast and barely answered his thoughtful questions.
I'm hoping that familiarity will breed comfort (rather than contempt) and eventually she'll be able to look him in the eye and carry on a normal conversation.
But perhaps having a crush on her teacher won't be a bad thing; she might practice really hard in order impress him!
We'll see.
Last month I was inspired. There's a youth in our ward who plays the guitar very well. He's preparing to serve a mission, so he's on the hunt for work of any kind. He's a ballet teacher, so he's used to teaching. I asked him if he'd be willing to teach E12.
We struck a deal (in which I am woefully underpaying him, but hope to remedy that soon).
He showed up promptly and prepared.
I was impressed.
In spite of the chaos of getting the rest of the family off to a college basketball game to which they were invited at the last minute, he was poised and pleasant.
I was impressed again.
He's customizing the lessons to fit her interests.
I am impressed even more.
The only problem I can find is that E12 is a 12-year-old girl and her teacher is an 18-year-old boy, and I think her little heart pitter-pats too fast to think clearly. When I peeked in at the lessons, she had her eyes downcast and barely answered his thoughtful questions.
I'm hoping that familiarity will breed comfort (rather than contempt) and eventually she'll be able to look him in the eye and carry on a normal conversation.
But perhaps having a crush on her teacher won't be a bad thing; she might practice really hard in order impress him!
We'll see.
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Assessment 2012--H3
This little girl loves life!
The frame of our preschool is the alphabet--one letter at a time we explore fun crafts. Preschool is an excuse to make sure I give H3 some special attention each day. She knows the alphabet, and she can count accurately at least to 10, but probably higher. She can write her own name and can copy anything we hand her. She loves to paint, cut, color, and do whatever she sees her big sisters do. She is incredibly verbal and hilariously funny! She can make me laugh when she wants to without fail!!!
She is rather naughty during family prayer and scripture time each night (What to do? What to do?), but during A5's devotional time she is an active participant. She's memorizing scriptures, poems, and songs, and she loves the scripture stories I read.
She helps me cook and clean--last night she washed dishes for at least half an hour. She listens to great stories every afternoon and at bedtime. She goes on nature outings with us. She loves cuddles and kisses and lots of closeness.
I love the life in this little girl!
The frame of our preschool is the alphabet--one letter at a time we explore fun crafts. Preschool is an excuse to make sure I give H3 some special attention each day. She knows the alphabet, and she can count accurately at least to 10, but probably higher. She can write her own name and can copy anything we hand her. She loves to paint, cut, color, and do whatever she sees her big sisters do. She is incredibly verbal and hilariously funny! She can make me laugh when she wants to without fail!!!
She is rather naughty during family prayer and scripture time each night (What to do? What to do?), but during A5's devotional time she is an active participant. She's memorizing scriptures, poems, and songs, and she loves the scripture stories I read.
She helps me cook and clean--last night she washed dishes for at least half an hour. She listens to great stories every afternoon and at bedtime. She goes on nature outings with us. She loves cuddles and kisses and lots of closeness.
I love the life in this little girl!
Assessment 2012--A5
She is one of the brightest parts of my life. Five-year-olds are just so special to me! This little girl loves to do preschool with her little sister. She loves her reading lessons; she is doing great! We used Sonlight K reading/language arts for most of the year and she just thrived on it. In addition we read lots of early readers on our own and she reads at least 1 verse a day from the Book of Mormon. I think she is reading far beyond her years. This year we are moving on to Sonlight Language Arts 1, and we will keep the additional reading and Book of Mormon reading. It's working!
As for the rest of school, I'm not worried about it. We read fun library books on science, history, math, geography--every subject imaginable. At night I read aloud to her from chapter books like All-of-A-Kind Family, A Grain of Rice, A Bear Called Paddington, Mr. Popper's Penguins, etc. She plays math games on the computer and learns songs and games from PBSkids.org. Over the Christmas break she discovered Dance Mat Typing, and I am allowing all kinds of extra computer time for her as she avidly learns to type.
Yesterday she discovered that she can thread a needle and make things all by herself!
And last but not least we have devotional every morning in which we memorize a scripture, memorize a poem, sing a primary song, and read a scripture story.
It is a privilege to be a part of this little girl's learning and growing!
As for the rest of school, I'm not worried about it. We read fun library books on science, history, math, geography--every subject imaginable. At night I read aloud to her from chapter books like All-of-A-Kind Family, A Grain of Rice, A Bear Called Paddington, Mr. Popper's Penguins, etc. She plays math games on the computer and learns songs and games from PBSkids.org. Over the Christmas break she discovered Dance Mat Typing, and I am allowing all kinds of extra computer time for her as she avidly learns to type.
Yesterday she discovered that she can thread a needle and make things all by herself!
And last but not least we have devotional every morning in which we memorize a scripture, memorize a poem, sing a primary song, and read a scripture story.
It is a privilege to be a part of this little girl's learning and growing!
Assessment 2012--J9
She was only 8 throughout the year, but her birthday really did come and go right as the year changed.
Why does 9 feel so much older than 8?
She is my academic girl. She loves reading and writing, and when I handed her the workbook that is taking the place of real school for the next couple of months she cheered. When she's reading, writing, or doing arithmetic, she can hear nothing else. It takes multiple aggressive attempts to get her attention when she is lost in the world of learning.
I see myself in her--the good things.
I failed to write about copywork/dictation in the older girls' assessments. This area is dropped for the time being, but it is one in which we have been faithful for the past year or two. She is careful, so her handwriting and spelling are beautiful. She works slowly, so I get to practice patience. I believe it is a valuable tool for teaching spelling, grammar, punctuation, and style. I can see the benefits in J9's writing--but she could use some formal lessons in using periods at the ends of her sentences!
Language Arts:
She's finished her NaNoWriMo novel, and it is nearly entered into the computer. She's been revising as she types, so it has been a dreadfully slow process. However, it is clear that she grasps the concept of revision and is not afraid of it. She has a wry voice, not much given to description, that has made me laugh aloud several times when I have had the privilege of reading her work.
She's also finally given up reading that dreadful fairy series she was in love with and has moved on to Warriors. It is a small step up, but at least it is a step up. I'm supplementing her free time reading with some quality youth novels, and I'm quite confident that over time she'll start choosing better and better literature for herself.
Math:
As are her sisters, she's quite enjoying Life of Fred and understanding what she learns as she works her way through the books.
Horses:
Her elective of choice has been Beautiful Feet Books History of the Horse. I literally have to order her to put her work away because I need the kitchen table for lunch or preschool. She is industrious and joyful in her work. (And her Christmas/birthday present is a series of 4 horseback riding lessons starting in 1 week!)
History/Science/Scripture Study:
She joins the rest of the older girls for these activities and definitely understands what we read about. She writes excellent summaries in her journals and asks pertinent questions. She is careful and exact in her science writings and drawings. I enjoy her insights and enthusiasm.
J9 is the student we all wish we could have--careful, industrious, pleasant, bright, inquisitive. She's just fun to be around and a joy to learn alongside. I am confident that with or without my supervision, this little girl will learn everything she needs to be a competent, joyful adult.
Why does 9 feel so much older than 8?
She is my academic girl. She loves reading and writing, and when I handed her the workbook that is taking the place of real school for the next couple of months she cheered. When she's reading, writing, or doing arithmetic, she can hear nothing else. It takes multiple aggressive attempts to get her attention when she is lost in the world of learning.
I see myself in her--the good things.
I failed to write about copywork/dictation in the older girls' assessments. This area is dropped for the time being, but it is one in which we have been faithful for the past year or two. She is careful, so her handwriting and spelling are beautiful. She works slowly, so I get to practice patience. I believe it is a valuable tool for teaching spelling, grammar, punctuation, and style. I can see the benefits in J9's writing--but she could use some formal lessons in using periods at the ends of her sentences!
Language Arts:
She's finished her NaNoWriMo novel, and it is nearly entered into the computer. She's been revising as she types, so it has been a dreadfully slow process. However, it is clear that she grasps the concept of revision and is not afraid of it. She has a wry voice, not much given to description, that has made me laugh aloud several times when I have had the privilege of reading her work.
She's also finally given up reading that dreadful fairy series she was in love with and has moved on to Warriors. It is a small step up, but at least it is a step up. I'm supplementing her free time reading with some quality youth novels, and I'm quite confident that over time she'll start choosing better and better literature for herself.
Math:
As are her sisters, she's quite enjoying Life of Fred and understanding what she learns as she works her way through the books.
Horses:
Her elective of choice has been Beautiful Feet Books History of the Horse. I literally have to order her to put her work away because I need the kitchen table for lunch or preschool. She is industrious and joyful in her work. (And her Christmas/birthday present is a series of 4 horseback riding lessons starting in 1 week!)
History/Science/Scripture Study:
She joins the rest of the older girls for these activities and definitely understands what we read about. She writes excellent summaries in her journals and asks pertinent questions. She is careful and exact in her science writings and drawings. I enjoy her insights and enthusiasm.
J9 is the student we all wish we could have--careful, industrious, pleasant, bright, inquisitive. She's just fun to be around and a joy to learn alongside. I am confident that with or without my supervision, this little girl will learn everything she needs to be a competent, joyful adult.
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